Wedding traditions can be an important part of any wedding ceremony. However, most traditions are based on gender roles and can be exclusionary to gender non-conforming people or people in a same-sex relationship. If you’re looking to plan a wedding that breaks free from traditional gender norms and creates an inclusive and joyful atmosphere for all, you’ve come to the right place! We wanted to explore how to incorporate genderless wedding traditions and make your special day respectful of everyone.
Outfits
Let’s start with the couple themselves. Wedding attire is one of the most traditional outfits one will ever wear… Or is it?… Set the tone of your ceremony by choosing what feels the most comfortable for you and the clothes in which you feel more like yourself. If your clothes make you feel anything other than beautiful, you might want to reconsider what you choose to wear. You don’t have to be a bride in a long white gown; you can wear pants, a suit, bright pink, or black. Your day, your choice.
Wearing a shorter dress is a great option for those who are not changing for reception and wish to comfortably dance the night away.
Wedding Roles
Traditionally, weddings assign specific roles to certain people like “bridal party” and “groomsmen”. Well, we say shake things up by having one beloved group of closest friends and family members as your “wedding party” regardless of gender. After all, this is a wedding, you’re all gonna be just one big family soon enough. You can call them attendants, wedding peeps, best bitches, or whatever you feel is best for you and your people. Also, it’s good to be flexible with what your attendants will wear! Encourage your wedding party to choose attire that reflects their individual style and personality. From suits to dresses or anything in between, let the fashion choices be a vibrant expression of self.
That being said, there’s also the “going down the aisle” situation… This is a moment with very established expectations, but as you’ve seen, we absolutely love to break expectations! Have your wedding party go down the aisle in groups of 3 or 4 people, or maybe assign best friends and siblings to walk together instead of having only heteronormative pairs.
And the moment everyone was waiting for: Instead of having one walk down the aisle with their father, couples can choose to walk down the aisle together or have both parents/a loved one walk them.
Erika chose to have her best friend, aka her sister, walk her down the aisle.
Wedding Language
The wedding language can sometimes be unwelcoming to gender non-conforming people and we’re always determined to change that. Instead of following the conventional script, simple adjustments ensure that the ceremony resonates with all couples, regardless of their gender identity. Replacing the traditional “husband” and “wife” references with terms like “partner” or “spouse” can sound like a big change but it is an easy one that will make all the difference for those that need to hear it.
Bouquet Toss
We could go on forever on wedding traditions with a twist, but we’ll stop here with one last tip. Shake things up! Instead of a gender-specific bouquet toss, how about a bouquet extravaganza? Everyone, regardless of gender, can participate in this lively event, competing to catch the bouquet and win a prize or just for good luck. It’s time to break those gender barriers and let everyone jump into the bouquet frenzy!
Planning a genderless wedding is all about celebrating love, inclusivity, and breaking free from traditional gender norms. By incorporating these ideas, you can create a wedding day that not only embraces all gender identities but also reflects the unique personalities of you and your partner. Remember, love knows no boundaries, and your special day should be a true reflection of that sentiment.